Cheating, Wrong or Animal Instinct?

THE FOUNDATION: Let me start by saying that the following content is in no way a campaign of me making excuses for cheating. Cheating is wrong on all planes of human life. However, I can’t help to think that maybe the initial desire is not always a sexual appetite but derived from our animal instinct. Yes, directly imitative of our distant cousins. I mean, think about it, at the core of mankind we are animals, are we not? This is something that no one can deny. Our ancestors may have utilized their animal instincts way more than we do today but within us all still simmers those very same animal intuitions that they used to survive … or more relevant, to reproduce.

Take a look at the animal kingdom, more specifically at the great lion. Male lions only stay with the female lions one to three years and then move on to another female and another and another. Sounds familiar?

THE FACTS: The majority of the time, it’s the female lion that goes and does the hunting or gathers the food. In our society, it is commonly the female that does the grocery shopping for the household. Now wait, I am not saying this to be some kind of macho, egotistical prick. Let’s face it, women do the grocery shopping because they are better shoppers than us men. Female lions do the hunting because they are better hunters than the male lion.

In the case that a male lion does hunt, what is the first thing he does? He carefully searches a herd of his prey. He chooses the one that will put up the least amount of resistance  and sets his eyes on the easy kill. He keeps a low profile until the perfect moment, waiting to strike and make the kill. As men, we often do this at bars and nightclubs. We find that perfect location where we can hideout. No, I do not mean to literally hideout. What I mean is we choose to stand in a spot where we look calm and unthreatening to the herd or group of women that sit across the way. We observe the crowd until we find a woman that we feel we can take home that night, the prey that will give up the least amount of fight.

A starving lion will eat just about anything that it lays his eyes on. I know I have been guilty of trying new foods especially once my stomach begins to rumble. On the brink of starvation, humans are able to do things that to some may seem impossible.

The lion is perceived as the king of the jungle. Men are perceived as the king of the house. Well not all men, some women may beg to differ but you get the drift. One thing that women cannot deny is the expectations of men to protect the family. The same expectation that is required of a male lion to protect the pride.

THE THEORY: I have several friends, those who are loyal and some who are guilty of cheating. If cheating was the equivalent of stealing a candy bar from the local convenient store, then these guys would be in prison for life. That’s how many times these guys have cheated. Now you ask why these guys are even in relationships. Well that’s a topic for another day. For most guys it does not appear to be a question of rather they love their significant other or not. Men sometimes have sex just for the act of having sex with no emotions attached. What is intriguing is when a man cannot explain his hoaxing ways when he has committed himself and has promised to only be sexually active with one person.

Sure there are multiple reasons why men cheat; you may choose any reason from revenge to a traumatizing event that happen during ones adolescence. However, I’m not convinced that we accept every option. I write this to simply say, with all the comparisons between man and the lion, why is it that we accept a majority of the similarities yet we invalidate any possibility that those same animal instincts may cause our uncontrollable desire for other women?

I presume the real question is not what causes a man to cheat or why a man would bother to cheat. It is conclusive that all men have that sexual appetite. I guess the better question would be as to why some men are able to conquer this appetite and why some men are controlled by the sexual appetite–or should I say animal instinct?

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  1. Qiflows

    I agree. the Lion analogy is something i’ve always held true to. Hence they are my favorite animals, especially since i’ve learnt to refrain from imposing societies labeling and judgement onto them….the structure of the pride mirrors that of the traditional (or natural…that’s another debate) family structure among humans (excluding the multiple partners thing…..not under my roof anyway). I understand the statement made here. It is not a justification as you clearly expressed, i guess it just serves as another basis for exploring human nature and the hard-wiring that exists within us even in today’s modern ‘civilization’.

    However, the reason why it is difficult if not unreasonable as human beings, to accept that this is a credible reason is because of our higher state of consciousness. it’s what distinguishes us from being animals or men in the earlier stages of evolution. Cheating, in the realm of man goes beyond the notion of the act of sex. it’s the violation of loyalty, trust and commitment. in many cases, it’s the act of a deceitful person. Though another debate in itself, I can also argue how it is much in line with this idea of ‘civilization’ we’ve created. we are animals and beyond all the skylines, technology and jargon, the world we live in is a testament to that in so many ways. we’re not so different from the cave men. .. i.e. we have Lamborghini’s instead of a large kill.

    anyway, if we take it back to basics and draw upon what makes man control desire, and man that does not. Would it be just to suggest that there is a gradient of men? that some (wo)men are more animalistic than others; that some are more evolved than others?…..

    anyway, that being said. i appreciate this post…. t’s a great foundation for debate on the subject.

    when i used man; i was referring to mankind. men and women alike. However, i believe the motives for a woman cheating stems from more social, man-made influences moreover nature (in some cases).

    putting that all aside, nice post (:

  2. inthe10th

    Well stated!

    At times, the consciousness is guilty of blinding us from our natural instincts. Evolution is definitely a factor. However, would the man or women who are more animalistic be more or less evolved? The answer may rely more on self-awareness than anything else. A person who is not self-aware of their animal instincts versus a person who is.

    You really took the discussion to another level when comparing the Lamborghini to the large kill. We forget that even as cave men we were still subjects of societal influence. The ego was just as prevelent then as it is now.

    Thank you for your comment!

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